


honey, i been thinking about you

by alsoalsowik



Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016), Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: (spoiler alert a big one is jyn erso), Canon Compliant, Cassian centric, F/M, Not A Fix-It, a look into his mind and wants, elevator kiss
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-02
Updated: 2017-01-02
Packaged: 2018-09-14 08:08:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 718
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9170080
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alsoalsowik/pseuds/alsoalsowik
Summary: Somewhere between the explosion on Jedha and where he is now -- leaning against a wall, trying, desperately, not to collapse -- Cassian realizes that Jyn Erso is the last thing he’ll ever want.





	

**Author's Note:**

> the first line of this fic came to me as i was driving on NYE and the rest is thanks to the cassian andor playlist on spotify! the title is ripped directly from one of its songs, actually! i'm still head over heels for rebelcaptain, so feel free to send me a prompt on tumblr (baenakinskywalker). thanks for reading and please leave a review!

Somewhere between the explosion on Jedha and where he is now -- leaning against a wall, trying, desperately, not to collapse -- Cassian realizes that Jyn Erso is the last thing he’ll ever want. He knows, even though the mission is over, tonight will likely bring his death; he knew that Jyn wouldn’t stop until the plans for the star destroyer were transmitted to the Rebel base. He knew that he'd die helping her, if it came to that. 

(It nearly did.)

There’s a fire in her eyes that sets Cassian ablaze every time he looks in her direction. By even the most conservative estimates, he spends the better part of his days looking at her. Partly because Jyn’s too reckless for her own good and partly because he’s trying to work out why the steadfast set of her jaw and steely glare warms something in the pit of his stomach. 

Cassian’s only twenty-six, but he feels weary beyond his years. Something about Jyn -- her drive, her stubbornness, her compassion, maybe -- breathes life into him, parts of the twenty years he’s lost to fighting the Empire. He knows these feelings are dangerous; personal attachment has no place amongst the rebels and their cause. Still, when Cassian Andor wants something, he wants it with everything he has. 

And, gods, does he want her. 

The swirl of feelings rear their ugly, inconvenient head once more as Jyn helps him limp his way onto an Imperial elevator, no doubt leading to final resting place. As the heavy door shuts behind them, Cassian steals another in a long line of glances at Jyn. She’s beat up like he is, just in slightly better shape. At least she can support her full weight. 

Something in his heart swells when she looks his way and offers the most genuine smile he’s seen in years. She did it. Gods willing, the rebels are intercepting the plans at this very moment. Cassian knows Jyn feels guilt surrounding her father’s involvement in the Death Star. But the smile she’s flashing indicates a certain level of catharsis -- something Jyn deserves, after all this time. 

He’s got his own guilt to deal with. Maybe he deserves that relief, too. 

“We did it,” Jyn whispers. Cassian doesn’t miss how she emphasizes  _we_  and turns ever-so slightly into the broadness of his shoulders. It’s then that it  _really_  hits him: Jyn Erso, and everything being with her would mean, is the last thing he’ll ever want in this life. Time for some catharsis. 

With all of the resolve usually reserved for intelligence missions, Cassian leans down and presses his lips to Jyn’s. He grunts, back screaming at him for needing someone so short, but soldiers on. 

Jyn’s hand, calloused and bloody, comes up to thread through the hair at the base of his neck. She tugs, just a little, and Cassian decides  _fuck it all_  and kiss her like she -- like  _he_  -- deserves. His arms go from around her slim shoulders for support to around her waist, gripping hard at the soft flesh of her hips. 

She sighs. It’s a sound he wishes he could get used to. Her mouth opens under his and Cassian’s never tasted anything sweeter. She’s copper and iron, all bloody and broken like he is, but he takes it all in, running his tongue across her bottom lip. 

If they were in a different situation, Cassian would sweep her up, let her legs bracket his hips, and press her against the wall. He’d pay mind to the tightness in groin and  _do something_  about it. For now, Cassian settles for pulling her closer -- despite every muscle in his body screaming not to -- and inhales deeply. Jyn pulls back just enough to rest her forehead to his.

Standing hip to hip, nearly nose to nose, Cassian lets himself enjoy the simple sensation of being alive and holding Jyn in his arms. The pain he feels all over is nothing, not when he’s finally letting himself act on feelings unrelated to the Empire.

He's just about to say something when the elevator door slides open, letting in bright-white sunlight. He squints and lets Jyn help him into the warm air. Cassian nudges her in the direction of a beach down the way -- it looks like a good place to end. 


End file.
